|
DivorceSecret #5 Marriage counselling can lead to a better and easier divorce settlement. Find out why! Participation in marriage counseling indicates good faith and a willingness to at least try to make things better. If the marriage still ends in divorce, your spouse should be less bitter and less likely to want to hurt you.
DivorceSecret #3 Negotiate from inside the home! If your spouse wants you out, stay, tough it out until you work a deal. Why: This is just a form of leverage to help you negotiate. If your spouse wants you out, you have something your spouse wants. If you leave, you are giving up your leverage and getting nothing for it. Your spouse may give up something extra just to get you to leave. Plus, if you leave, your spouse may refuse to even negotiate at all.
DivorceSecret #6 Tough it out and find your spouse a job before you move out. You will save huge $$$ on alimony. Why: If your spouse is unemployed, you will probably have to pay spousal support (or more spousal support) and more child support. You are much better off waiting until your spouse is working again before moving out.
DivorceSecret #33.Leverage- key in successful negotiation. What will hurt your spouse the most? Trade for your best deal but don't be greedy. Why: Negotiation is all about leverage. What do you have that your spouse wants? Don't negotiate it away without getting something for it.
DivorceSecret #12. When negotiating a PSA, be nice to your spouse even if it hurts. Fighting will drive you further apart. Why: The saying "you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar" is true. It is human nature to want to be nice to someone who is being nice to you. Conversely, if you are saying hateful things to your spouse, they are not likely to be in a generous mood and might not even want to negotiate at all.
DivorceSecret #29 Don't say "divorce" when trying to work a settlement with a jilted spouse. Just talk "separation". Why: Many spouses cannot deal with the "D" word (divorce), psychologically, it I just easier for them to talk about "separation" even if it is almost certain to lead to a divorce.
DivorceSecret #40-SEPARATE VACATIONS--Is your marriage in trouble? Lack of common interests and intimacy spells trouble. Why: It is rare for healthy marriages to include separate vacations. It is okay to do things separately on occasion, but if you are only taking one major vacation a year, it should be with your spouse.
|
|